This morning the Lord reminded me of the importance of His timing. I feel like in my short amount of years, the Lord has revealed a great deal of teaching and wisdom in my life. So much so, that it feels as though my heart and mind will bust if it is not let out. My hearts desire is to tell everyone of the truths I have been taught so that they can experience the blessings and intimacy with God that I have received. However, the words do not flow out but are stuck. I have prayed and pleaded with God, “why have you shown these things to me but I am unable to speak them?”
His response: My timing is perfect and I’m preparing the way. I’m preparing hearts and minds to hear the message. I will make you a city on a hill a strong tower. You will proclaim all that I have taught you. It is all in my control.
This message is a hard one to swallow. Who am I? No one. I’m not special I’m not qualified or experienced. There is nothing about me that suggests that I would be used in a mighty way or even be on a radar to be used at all. I don’t understand why the Lord reveals truths to me that seem so beyond my years. But I am thankful for it. I understand I have been given a gift and I have a responsibility to care for it, invest it and not squander it away but it isn’t from me. Nothing that I do entitles me or makes me deserving. I just know that Christ has radically transformed my heart and he keeps doing it and I cannot slow the pursuit of Him. I want everyone to know of this intense love and relationship that can be found in him.
So I must trust that the Lord will allow the messages to flow in His perfect timing. I must not be a bomb splattering truth across all that I see but understanding He chooses to use me as precision tool using the Holy Spirit to cut to the hearts for true change.
This is a hard message.